Reading my copy of Metro this morning whilst crushed between commuters on the central line I was very interested to learn that researchers have discovered that a voucher or free gift triggers an emotional response as powerful as physical arousal!

Now admittedly these researchers were commissioned by the Institute of Promotional Marketing, but they were people of science nonetheless – from the University of Westminster – and they used the iMotions system which tracks pupil dilation and movement to gauge emotional response, which sounds pretty impressive to me.

One example cited said that a Marmite promotion which offered a free Horrid Henry audio-book resulted in scores of up to 5.8 out of ten. Put into context, erotic images usually trigger scores of between five and seven whilst ten is the equivalent of severe trauma.

I seem to remember reading somewhere before that chocolate can have a similar effect on the brain too.

Anyway, all this got me thinking: if brands can generate higher sales because consumers like being aroused by freebies in the same way that they like being aroused by erotic images surely the most successful campaigns would be those giving away free porn.

I can just see the Sun headlines now: “Hospitals at crisis point as trauma toll rises from Cadbury’s filth flick giveaway.”

Anyone remember those geeky sci-fi role-playing books of the eighties?

You know the ones where the story follows a single direction for the first few pages and then the reader is faced with two or three options of how to progress the plot – turn to page 82 to fight the dragon; turn to page 54 to run away; turn to page 41 to use your magic invisibility potion and sneak past undetected?

Well the latest Tippex campaign should have fans of those books frothing at the mouth as they raise the bar with their offering. Why limit yourself to two or three choices? Type ANYTHING you like to progress the plot and watch in astonishment as it unfolds on screen before your very eyes.

OK, admittedly the “story” of the advert and any outcome is less than a minute long and it took me about six attempts before I found some verbs that the ad couldn’t deliver, but even then it gave a humorous take on the standard “Error #404” bad request message.

The way this has been made, the relevance to the product and the subsequent coverage it has achieved has made it an instant hit – and surely it will pave the way for hundreds of other brands to launch similar campaigns.

Unfortunately though, I still can’t think that I’d actually have much use for Tippex these days.

Do the lengths companies go to research consumer habits today have any limits? It would seem not! Working with a research client for over 3 years I’m fully aware of companies employing neuroscience as a method finding out what makes consumers tick, but this takes the biscuit.

Earlier this year Royal Mail commissioned Millward Brown and Academics at Bangor University to undertake a study to determine if the brain reacts differently to marketing messages delivered through direct mail in comparison to email campaigns. This was based on the assumption that consumers tend to engage more to physical objects that they would to an electronic format.

Participants were shown the same creative format in both digital and print. Following this a measurement of brain activity was taken in the MRI scanner to identify parts of the brain that show increased activity by imaging changes in the blood supply.

The research showed that certain parts of the brain were more active when given a piece of physical direct mail (you don’t say). So in short the research found that actually holding something in your hand is “a significantly more multi-sensory than marketing that appears online”.

The study concluded that “when a piece of DM was held and read by a participant, their reactions suggested that they were experiencing thought patterns similar to those the brain exhibits when processing memories and emotions. Other studies have shown that emotional processing can generate a positive response to brands and their messages, and enhanced levels of engagement. When someone engages with an emotional response through tangible material, it produces an enhanced recognition that can result in increased attention given to the brand in the future.”

This is all very interesting stuff and I agree that holding something in your hand will of course create a stronger response within the brain than looking at the same creative on your computer, but perhaps the next study should look at how we can promote the brain to pick it up and read it instead of chucking it in the bin in the first place?

Now there’s a thought.